Lieutenant Part 4

 “What we have here is a sensitive issue.”

I like to think of myself as the Sheriff of the Middleton pocket. My daddy was a nobody nothing, but he was a good, just man and he raised a boy who would never back down from a fight and he raised no fool.

“If the government were not encroaching so on our beloved pocket then we would not feel the need to defend ourselves in such a way.”

“No, sir,” and there’s the deputy that I thought would never make more of himself than a lump in the basement couch. It sure is a nice day out today for such nasty business. I’m happy to be here with him for it.

“Now, this one here on the left from the entrance…”

“The shot-up car’s computer identifies him as Parker.”

“Parker. Parker’s dead.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Would you say he died peacefully?”

“I believe he took buckshot pretty deep into his right lobe and the pain rendered him unconscious where after he peacefully found his way to his respective maker by bleeding out.”

“There’s all sorts of shit coming out of that head.”

“And more to come judging by the circling flies.”

“I was trying to not be reminded of that.”

“The circle of life, Daddy. Like the Lion King taught us.”

“I’ll be damned if I knew old Disney movies would be relevant to a mess such as this.”

“Hakuna Matata.”

This is a good time to glare at the boy, which he don’t take personally and I find quite satisfying.

“This other fella…”

“Smith, sir.”

“This bloody trail seems to suggest that he crawled all the way to the back of the store.”

“Looks like he pushed himself backwards using his good hand and I’d imagine he was pretty upset about his buddy.”

“The markings do not seem to indicate a Hollywood like mourning of the corpse.”

“He appears to have been preoccupied with more personal matters.”

“Too right. Something weighing down his chest.”

“Several fist blows most likely the cause of all that…uh…internal injury.”

“Yes…that quite unpleasant sight the man is making of himself these days.”

“So…”

“So…our canvas of the area…”

“5 out of 5 eyewitnesses reported the shooter leaving after the second shotgun round, then attempting to ignite the cruiser’s gas tank. One eyewitness noting that the shooter was not standing adequate distance away from said cruiser.”

“However, the ignition not going according to plan caused the shooter to tred down this road back towards…uh…”

“No reports of following said shooter given his state and his piece.”

“Right. No place of residence for our shooter. Good Samaritans all having been waved off by said piece and angry gesturing.”

“Pocketeers in the area not having the wherewithal to subdue said shooter.”

“I wish you would just call them citizens of the pocket or something.”

“Pocketeer is this week’s nickname.”

“I find it a sight better than Pockees.”

“Pockadillos?”

“Pockarin…we must return to the task-at-hand.”

“Pockadillos is tabled until next week”

“The second victim…”

“Smith.”

“Right. Smith. Crawls to the back of the store.”

“And manages to suffer massive internal injury.”

“Which brings me to another point of interest.”

“The old man with the massive internal injuries and smashed-to-fuck head.”

“Suggestive of a possible accomplice even though eyewitnesses claim to have only seen the one boy. Or some kind of multiple personality.”

“Why is that?”

“Well, that lies in the modus operandi.”

“This something from a video game?”

“A really old one.“

“Sure enough.”

“We’ve got our old man as our stiffest corpse. Eyewitnesses have the shooter following the officers into the store for this here ambush.”

“The cameras we set up catch any of this?”

“The owner of the store did not have our surveillance package and the neighbors are still in negotiations.”

“Well, I’ll be.”

“One thinks back wistfully to the time when protection and law enforcement was a public good.”

“I wouldn’t trust the government to wet itself properly.”

“And so here we are.”

“It’s their blasted propaganda machines that called us the pockets, but what we really are is the market. Pure and unalduterated.”

“We are brave and bold marketers.”

“Now, I said stop with that shit, boy. You’re as bad as them. Always trying to sell something but not tell the truth about what it is.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Now where the fuck were we?”

“Possible two suspects. Possible one suspect with a multiple personality disorder.”

“Boy, there is a switch somewhere a mile long with your name on it.”

“My infamy precedes me.”

“It would be most prudent at this juncture to question fellow officers at the checkpoint why two of their most hated officers responded to a call in-pocket if we were so fortunate to have a reason to ask for such information other than that they’ve just been murdered by one or two pocketeers.”

“I knew pocketeers would catch on.”

“Goddamnit, boy.”

“Or we’ll wait a day for next week to start with Pockadillos.”

“Let’s pray you live to see it. This is not a particularly happy situation for us to be in. We have our competitors to think about not to mention the government of the Divided States of America.”

“Could be a pocket war in the mix.”

“The ownership of our package falls to the next-of-kin who we’ll need to contact regarding his or her preferred course of action.”

“There may be investigation fees incurred.”

“The contract states that investigation fees will be incurred if we are unable to find the perpetrator of the crime within seven days. Moreover this is a pocket matter and concerns our reputation as providers of protection services.”

“So we might take the hit on this one.”

“We’ve taken a hit already. Now is the time for damage control.”